A New Year

Here it is the first day of a new year. What is there to say? This past year has been so incredibly unbelievable. A year ago (January 2, 2008) we went to the neurologist and he confirmed all the tests that Steve had undergone showed nothing...there was no explanation for his "spells." There wasn't anything to do, but keep his blood pressure under control and he would see Steve again in July. We all know what happened...the surreal feelings that come with a loved one dieing...the questions that come and go...the if only, would have, should have... But it all doesn't change the fact that he is gone and we miss him and his love and spirit lives on in all of us who knew him and loved him. Genevieve reminds me constantly that his love is and will always be growing with us...That thought is what helps get me through the tough times. As hard as all of this has been...I see good things in the kids...the resiliency they exhibit, the love and caring they show...the tears that come and cleanse. We have pulled together. We have built friendships with others that weren't in our lives before. We have reached out to accept help and support. The love and kindness that are present in our lives is remarkable and a blessing. Through our loss we have been blessed with so many good people...the new friends, the friends that have stayed and yet some other friends have disappeared. It is easy sometimes to just focus on the loss and the emptiness...we have reached a good balance (I think!) We will continue to miss Steve and focus on the good things that are happening. As they say...Life goes on.